3.01.2008

Indecision


To climb down, to jump, to sit still. If only all choices were so simple.

There's a poll over at the Bead Journal Project, sounding out interest in doing the Journal again, for a second year. I find myself very conflicted about this.

Personally, this has been a very rewarding project. On one hand, I'd like to do it again, just for the schmooze factor. I've enjoyed watching how others of My Kind create and produce art from beads, and I have learned much. It has been fun, and part of me never wants the fun to end. But on the other hand . . .

One of the most appealing aspects of working on the Bead Journal Project, for me, has been its finite quality - that it would have a distinct beginning, process, and ending. Knowing my time would be limited gave me the discipline and impetus to pour it on, pedal to the metal, and dump all I had into it.

Other projects now beckon, other opportunities for growth present themselves, new challenges are begging to be met.

I figured if I started blogging about this, it would help me come to a decision, and it has.

I want this past year to remain something very special in my memory - a unique, once-in-my-lifetime event. My primary goal has yet to be reached - that of sticking with this to the end, so there's still time to savor this experience. However, I don't want to repeat this same challenge. For one thing, I'm concerned I'd devolve into cranking out "wallpaper" by trying to match the intensity of what I've already done and falling short, having exhausted my BJP coin, as it were.

It's a case of "been there, done that" and did it well enough that I don't feel the call to do it again. I need to find new worlds to conquer - whether they be interior or exterior. I suppose my decision is made.

When we reach the end of this adventure in May, I'll be sad to say goodbye but at the same time happy to turn my face to the next horizon, the next jumping-off place.

6 comments:

  1. I admire your convictions, Morwyn. But you can bet that I will continue to follow your adventures in beading! As I said before, yours was the first blog I visited as part of the BJP and I wouldn't want to ever miss a chance to see what you are creating nor read your thoughts on inspiration.


    Kathy V in NM

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  2. Your logic is irrefutable, but I'm with Kathy V: now that I've found you I'll be checking in on you to see what you're up to whether or not the BJP continues for another year!

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  3. All the blogs are still going and will probably continue since everyone has learned that new thing too. A lot of people started with the BJP as their first endeavor in the larger world of art (me included here) but are now spreading out and trying new things. So, you can always visit and see what's going on.

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  4. It was helpful to read your comments as I have some similar thoughts roving around in my head.
    Not sure yet what my conclusion will be.

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  5. Oh Morwyn, I will miss you so much... your work, your writing and your comments are so inspirational to me (and I'm sure to others as well). I'm not trying to twist your arm... I respect your decision and your reasons. I too will remain a visitor to your blog, because I sense in you a kindred spirit, one whose art and craftmanship I respect and admire. I'm so very pleased to get to "know" you through the BJP... and I hope to see your pages in person one day.

    Blessings, Robin A.

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  6. Well, Morwyn, I must say I don't understand your logic here.

    However, as the others have said, whatever your decision, I'll sure come back to check out your blog.

    Take care,

    Hélène

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